What I was thinking when Tom would come over

When Tom came over to the garage, things just changed a lot. At first I wasn't really thinking about it, but I eventually grew suspicious. I mean Tom was being nice and all about giving me the car, but something was just not right. When it was just me and Myrtle, Myrtle would just seem disheartened and just ignore me. However, when Tom walks into my shop, she starts to get all excited, but still ignores me. That's when I knew something was up. It would make sense for Myrtle to fancy Tom because she always wants the luxurious stuff and Tom has the money to provide for that life. However, I just let the situation be because I didn't know for one hundred percent it was Tom, but I would bet money on it. I just didn't want to get involved into anything more than what I already was. I feel like I've been dirt poor all my life, and Tom was rich and powerful. I'm sure if I would've spoken up, he could just get a hit on me and take me out. I wouldn't want to mess with him. All I want is for Myrtle to love me back. When Tom would come over, Myrtle didn't even look at me, so why should I expect her to love. I was a fool for thinking Tom just came over to visit.

Why I killed myself

Unlike the rich careless classes, the lower classes, like me, can't just retreat back into their money. My class actually has to take responsibility for their actions, and we don't have trips to Paris to make it all better. After killing Gatsby I really didn't feel like dealing with the consequences because life was already so bad for me. After all that had happened, I couldn't see things getting any better. The reason for living was no longer there.Times were already bad enough for me, before I killed Gatsby. I barely made enough to get Myrtle and I through. I already planned on killing myself because of the hard times and Myrtle having a relationship with another man.Once I actually found out that Myrtle was cheating on me without a doubt, it just set me off the edge. I wanted to kill myself more than ever, but I didn't want to die alone. I just killed myself with Gatsby to take someone down with me. I feel like I didn't deserve to die alone. After all Gatsby did hit Myrtle with the car, so i brought him to justice. At least I could do a little good before I killed myself. Moreover, I killed my self because I was angry. Not only angry at people, but the entire world. I have suffered so much my entire life, I I just couldn't take it any longer. Some people say suicide is a "permanent solution to a temporary problem." Even though it may be like that in most cases, my life was very tragic, and suicide was my only option.

What I was feeling when Myrtle always left

When Myrtle left unexpectedly sometimes, I became sad because I thought she would like to stay with me. When this started occurring more frequently, I grew angry and yet suspicious. Why would a girl need to leave so much.I began to notice that every time Tom would visit and leave, she would leave soon after. I grew so angry with her that I locked her up in my room above the garage.I also told her she might fool me but she couldn't fool God. I told her to look to the window... and said, "God knows what you've been doing. You may fool me, but you can't fool God." After this, I  began to feel bad because I didn't completely give her a chance to explain. I really just assumed  when I shouldn't have. Even though Myrtle may have been cheating on me, I have to admit that I still had feelings for her. Most of the time when she left unexpectedly, I would think of stuff she would be doing, and if she is even thinking about me. The more I thought about it, the sadder I got. I guess you could saw that I got depressed over time, because Myrtle was away from me more than she was with me. The more sad I got, the angrier I got also. I honestly felt Myrtle had betrayed me.

Why I killed Gatsby

The reasons vary for why I  killed Gatsby but first of all let me tell you that I was the true victim. From Myrtle's disloyalty to Gatsby hitting Myrtle, I was the victim, not Gatsby. Poor Gatsby... poor me!! All my tragic life, I had nothing to rejoice other than having Myrtle. Its amazing how fast your world can tumbling down. I killed Gatsby because my anger grew so much, that I just needed to see revenge.  The day Myrtle was killed, I had Michaelis look in a drawer, where he found an expensive dog leash. This was the clue that set me off. I concluded that the man who killed Myrtle had also given her the dog leash. He was the man who owned the yellow car. Full of anger and frustration about Myrtle’s disloyalty, I acted on my impulses and killed Jay Gatsby.On another note, before I killed Gatsby I went to Tom’s thinking it was him, but Tom was able to point where the yellow car was, and it was Gatsby all along. Surely it had to be Gatsby. I trusted Tom because he offered to give me a car. It was shear impulse for me to get revenge for the women I love. Myrtle meant everything to me, even though she may have been cheating on me. I found him in his pool and wasted no time. I shot several times, killing him. Then killed myself, for there was no purpose for me to live anymore. Myrtle was gone and I got the revenge that satisfied me. Even though I was mad at the entire world, I specifically targeted Gatsby because I had a reason to do so, and he was an easy target to take my anger out. I just had a mental breakdown, and let my anger take over my actions, which led to me killing Gatsby. Maybe he deserve it, maybe he didn't. I was just angry and some one had to pay.

What I was feeling when Myrtle died

When Myrtle died, I was both angry and sad. How could someone hit an innocent being and then drive off. I was devastated because Myrtle was the only reason for me living. The old garage didn't mean that much to me. Knowing I had Myrtle, made me look over the fact of how poor I was. However, after looking at her lifeless body for a while, my anger grew. I was not only angry at the person who hit her with the yellow car, but I was also angry at the world. Why would God let this happen to me after all the suffering I had to endure already. This combination of being sad and angry made me become frustrated. My emotions were in conflict as was my world. Now I felt like I had nothing, and this emptiness overtook my emotions. I wanted more than an apology, I craved revenge.

Now I felt like I had no purpose and nothing to live for. Almost my entire life, I tried my best to provide for the life that Myrtle desired so much. In return, She brightened my day, so I wouldn't be overshadowed by the dreadfulness of the valley of ashes. When Myrtle died, I didn't have that sunshine in day that always lingered over me and let me know everything was going to be okay. Certainly, now everything was the opposite of okay, the love of my life was dead. I was sad and more angry than ever.

What I was thinking when I found the dog leash

The day Myrtle died,  Michaelis looked in Myrtle's drawer, where he found an expensive dog leash. When I saw this dog leash, I knew I didn't buy it for her, because I couldn't even afford a thing like that. Because of this clue,  I concluded that the man who killed Myrtle had also given her the dog leash. He was the man who owned the yellow car. Not only was I angry at the man who killed Myrtle, but I couldn't wrap my head around why Myrtle would cheat on me. I mean I already had suspicions about Tom and Myrtle, but I just tried to avoid it because I really wanted Tom to give me his car, when he got the new one. I mean, I was sad about Myrtle dying and all, but how could she do this to me. All I ever did, was try to provide the best possible life for her. She betrayed me after all the hardships we went through together. Maybe this guy had more money than me, but I definitely loved her more. From the moment I saw that expensive dog leash, I knew I had to do something to the guy who was sneaking around with Myrtle. Everything pointed to Tom, so he was my first guess. However, when I went to his house, he said it was Gatsby. I didn't care that much who did it, some one just needed to pay.